Fear

I recently registered Abrasive Media as a company. If I listened to all the negative statistics of how many companies failed within the first year, I most probably wouldn’t have done it. The odds were against me.

If I listened to how many doctoral candidates do not finish their degrees or how long it took them to complete their degrees, I definitely wouldn’t have registered for a PhD.

If I listened and considered that the throughput rate for undergraduate students in South Africa was 16 per cent, I would’ve even thought about registering for a degree. I would’ve accepted that I was destined to be a construction or farm worker.

If I looked at my family and saw that none of them completed high school and that I was destined to be the first one, I would’ve dropped out and did something that was destined for me.

But I didn’t.

Fear was always present, and it still is. But I didn’t place fear in front of me to prevent me from doing anything. I placed it behind me so that it pushed me. I know what it feels like not to have food or not to have decent clothes or a place to stay. I didn’t want that. My fear was that I will be forever trapped in those circumstances.

So my approach is to try and outrun fear; be a step ahead in everything I do. A step ahead of the rest. Maybe this why people find it difficult to work with me and think that I full of myself. This stems from trying to be a step ahead. I already anticipated the moves they have considered, or I am simply not there anymore. I was where they are at a while back.

So I registered Abrasive Media as a company not because I have figured everything out. Or have the security needed to start a successful business venture. I simply did it because I did not fear that it would fail. If it fails, it fails, but at least I tried.

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